My Aunt Gladys

Aunt Gladys, me, and Grandma Cyn in 2005

My Grandma Cyn and I are very close. We have lots of good times together and we laugh a whole lot. Along with my Grandma Cyn who I call weekly, I also call weekly my other grandparents, and I call down in Florida to see how my friend Mary is doing, and I would also call my Aunt Gladys. Aunt Gladys is my Grandma Cyn's older sister.

 Many times when Grandma and I would talk about things, she would sometimes feel she was cheated out on certain things in life. After all her father died when she was a mere five years old. A few years later at 13 her mother died. When she was in her fifties she lost her husband, my grandfather. The one long term constant she always had in her life was my Aunt Gladys.

Both parents gone by the time she was 13, my grandmother was pretty much raised by her 19 year old sister and her husband, my Uncle "Lefty". SO her sister, who she shared everything with and was very close with became more of her mother. Pretty much most of their family deserted them when they were so young and then all past away by the time they were in their forties. Both women never believed they would make it past their forties.

Grandma Cyn and Aunt Gladys in the 1960s

Aunt Gladys and Grandma Cyn at my parent's wedding in 1982.

 Well both women have lived very long lives and have made beautiful families. My Aunt Gladys and Uncle Lefty had three wonderful boys who married wonderful women who were treated as daughters by my Aunt Gladys. My Grandma Cyn left her Jewish roots and married this loud Italian family and had three children who all had children of their own as well. Both grew these beautiful families when their family left these two young teenage girls all alone.

The legacies continued and as matriarchs taught their families love, compassion, values, and support. They gave tradition, laughter, and wonderful memories and they did this through demonstrating this with each other. They loved each other, talked constantly and always kept great presence with each other's lives.

I remember many times going over for Passover and going to my cousin's Bar Mitzvahs and Bat Mitzvahs, Aunt Gladys came to almost every Christmas we had over here, and I always wore my red ya-mica thinking it was so cool when I was younger. My Grandma would always talk about "her sister" and the stories and memories they shared. Not only in good times but in bad. When my grandfather died in the 80s, Aunt Gladys was there for her sister. When Uncle Lefty died unexpectedly, Grandma Cyn stayed with Aunt Gladys in Long Island until after shiva.

Grandma Cyn and Aunt Gladys in the 90s

Grandma Cyn and Aunt Gladys at a family party. 

 Aunt Gladys was very big on fashion and looking good. My Grandma Cyn isn't too far from the tree when it comes to looking good herself. Aunt Gladys was not a vain person but did always want to look good, and she always did! She was always very creative with her hands and took classes such as painting and pottery and things of that nature. She also worked right into her late 80s, maybe early 90s.

Aunt Gladys always had some health issues over the years, but she always persevered. She was a fighter for sure. She survived cancers and illnesses, and just went with the flow. She always had a good perspective and I believe that's a key to living a long life. I remember Grandma Cyn said she hated watching old movies because she was depressed all those old actors and actresses were dead. I remember Aunt Gladys saying "Oh Cynthis get over it! We're all gonna get old and die someday! It's no big deal!"

She always said to live life and enjoy yourself. She ALWAYS said that. It's that reason I believe her granddaughter Erica went away to college, or why her grandson Cary went to Iceland to visit, or why her granddaughter Brittney went to work in the city, she always encouraged us all to live your life and enjoy it!

The sisters at Grandma's birthday 2005

Grandma Cyn and Aunt Gladys at a summer BBQ at Aunt Karen's house

 I remember one point, Aunt Gladys wasn't able to walk and get around easily. I remember calling her to say hello and I just happened to catch her all excited because she passed a test to have a scooter. At 90 years old she was taking and passing tests and having a goal set in mind! How amazing is that. "Oh Andrew I want this so bad!" I remember her telling me. She was very independent and liked to get around on her own. She liked doing for others and had a big heart, which she taught to my grandmother.

This past year I went to Long Island for Passover but Aunt Gladys wasn't feeling well and couldn't come. I was sad I didn't see her but I gave her a call. Weeks later, we were told she was not doing well and it was only a matter of time before we would have to say good bye. I've had a lot of loss in my life, but this time we knew it was coming.

I don't think I wanted to think about it. But I also knew I had a chance to say goodbye and tell someone I love them. It was a Wednesday and I was alone in my office and I called Aunt Gladys's number. Her son picked up and put me on speaker. "Hello Aunt Gladys! How are you feeling today?" "I'm fine how are you, dear?" she said in a weak voice, still seeing how I'm doing. "I'm good, I just wanted to call and tell you that I love you so much and I hope you are feeling well!." "Oh that's so nice," she said. "I love you too, hun, thanks for calling."

Aunt Gladys died Thurs June 11, 2015 at the age of 92 years old. I just so happened to have spent all day with Grandma Cyn earlier before we found out. My heart broke for my grandmother. I remember that afternoon I sat in front of Strive on the couch in front and just looked outside the window. I was so sad. I thought about her sons and my cousins, the beautiful family she made. My Aunt Gladys lived a good life. I think the only comfort for the family is to know that she is reunited with her beloved husband, our Uncle Lefty again. But alas! Her granddaughter last week gave birth to what would be Aunt Gladys's FIRST great-grandchild Charlie!

We know she's looking down and watching over young Charlie, and the rest of the family. I just got off the phone with Grandma Cyn, and she misses her sister very much. We all do. But we remember her, and think of her, and are all so grateful for the wonderful things she gave us, especially her love. And we love you, Aunt Gladys.

Uncle Left and Aunt Gladys, Christmas 2004

Yours in service,
MASTER A TRENTO

Day with Sifu

Sifu invited me one weekend in May to go down to Philadelphia for Kung Fu testing being done at one of the Yee's Hung Ga Academy branches. The branch is run by one of his disciples and after the testing was done, Sifu was to do a seminar. After testing and seminar they were driving down to Delaware where another student of Sifu's was opening an Acupuncture clinic and they were going to perform the Lion Dance.

I was really excited and happy to have been invited to come along. Everyone met at Sifu's school early that morning and we got into three of four cars. Sifu, Simo, and I had the car with the Lion heads and drums for the Lion Dance. We ran into a little traffic and then finally arrived at the school in Philly. The students who were testing were all lined up ready and waiting. This showed great discipline and spirit, to be standing there all that time, ready to go.

The testing began, with the forms and general knowledge, sparring, and the horse stance. I have taken a few Kung Fu tests of my own now and the ways Kung Fu do testing is very different than how Taekwondo tests. It's a great experience to observe and see different arts and how students progress. But it is also great to see how other schools express their martial arts through their testing. I've been on over a dozen or more different Black Belt testings for various martial arts. Even though I knew the testing process I really enjoyed watching these students test and see how they did their forms or hear their philosophies etc.

I also enjoyed looking at my Sifu, sitting next to his disciple observing. I was wondering what he was looking for. I was wondering what he was observing. I wonder what it was like for him to see his student's students testing. Just to see this lineage growing and continuing. He must have been so proud to see this group testing.

Sifu speaking before the testing began. 

Sifu and his disciple Sifu Sean. 

The students did great and then after testing Sifu began his workshop. I have been doing private lessons with Sif for three years. I really have never been taught by Sifu in a class setting per se. So I was very excited, working as a student in a class setting with some of the other Hung Ga students I've worked with along with Sifu Sean's students. Sifu is also a world class teacher, so of course it's a true honor to be learning from him in any setting.

He was remarkable, teaching the philosophy of the tiger. We partnered up, did some drills, and we also practiced some applications to the tiger method. Listening to the plethora of knowledge that Sifu dropped in this seminar was incredible. And yet I was so excited because I KNEW that it was only a small layer of a vast amount more information. I look forward to strive to one day understand and know the true depths of this art as Sifu does.

Watching him move, listening to him explain, watching how other students reacted to him, I was really thrilled to being there. And quite honestly, in an hour my mind was blown with all the information he gave us, and like I said I know it's only the icing on top of the cake to what there really is to know.

Sifu teaching his workshop in Philadelphia and Master Trento in the back. 

How could you go to Philadelphia and NOT get philly cheese steaks? SO that's what we did! We got philly cheese steaks and go into our cars and began to make our way to Delaware. Simo and Sifu and I got ot talk about the test and the workshop while eating in the car on the way there. I also got the backstory to his student, Barry, who was opening this acupuncture school.

Delaware Acupuncture is located in Newark, Delaware. Barry has been studying Chinese martial arts for 25 years, last 18 with Sifu and 18 years of Qigong. He holds a 3rd Degree Black Belt and he had asked Sifu to come down for his grand opening and to have his students perform the Lion Dance.

The Lion Dance symbolizes good fortune and is meant to protect against negative influences. It was known to be integrally part of kung fu training. It is vital to proper training and "live power". The Lion throws the lettuce as a symbol of prosperity and goes throughout the building bowing out back first from each room to spread it's good power. It's a beautiful thing to see.

I've heard about them, I knew about them, but I never got the chance to see one. It's something I very much want to learn about as well. I missed the one for Chinese New Year when I went with Thomas Cubby on Sifu and Simo's birthday. There is SO much to this dance. The coordination, the training, the movements, the cadence, the beating of the drums, there's a lot ot know and you can see that. As I watched Sifu beating on the drums and the others moving with the cadence of the drum, I felt it's awesome energy.

I had tears in my eyes for some reason, I don't know why. It could have been it's something I always wanted to see and I couldn't believe I was witnessing it finally after all this time. Maybe it was the gratitude to being a part of this awesome world. Maybe the energy of the Lion Dance was really hitting me. Maybe because I was happy for Barry, because I remember my grand opening of my business as if it were yesterday. But i was so happy to see this Lion Dance and I was proud of Barry. I began my business almost seven years ago, opened my doors six years ago. I want to have a huge celebration at ten years, and I'm going to have the Lion Dance there.

Sifu giving directions before the Lion Dance. 

Sifu and Patty.

Afterwards we all went out to get some dinner and it was just so nice to be together, laughing and enjoying our time together. There must have been like 16 of us together. I was also thrilled to spend time with Sifu and Simo. We had a very full day and a little bit of traffic on the way back to New Jersey. But I appreciated the experience so much.

The day was full of tradition, kung fu spirit, Qi, inspiration, knowledge, learning, friendship, lineage, family, and good feelings. It's a day we all wish we could always have. But those days often happen when you surround yourself with such wonderful people as I did that day. It was a beautiful day with Sifu.  (BOWS)

Yours in service,
MASTER A TRENTO

Superbowl Eye Opener

February was the Super Bowl. I don't follow football exactly, but I do enjoy watching it. But every year I celebrate the Super Bowl as if it were a holiday. I of course watched the Super Bowl every year but I consider when I first began my Super Bowl festivities in 2008 when the Giants won. Every  year since then I used to have an event. 2009 I hosted a beautiful get together at a friend's house. Then in 2010 at my apartment we had a huge Macaroni Sunday with LOTS of food for Super Bowl.

But in 2011, a horrible day I still remember to this day occurred. It's been labeled the Sorrow Bowl. It's amazing how certain events shape things that come to our lives later on. 2012 I still had a few people over but it was a sad and difficult time. But it got better the next year in 2013, and we went to Ara and Juneta's who hosted in 2014. So I usually celebrated Super Bowl with someone, but when I touched base with that person I realized it was more important to me than this person. I wasn't even a thought in any plans. 2014 was a year full of things breaking and things ending, so I decided I'll let go of the attachment my self.

I made no plans, so Ara and I invited a bunch of my students and friends over to watch the Super Bowl. We watched the game, had some laughs, ate food, shared stories, we had a beautiful time together. At one point we were showing pictures to each other and that morning I had found an old picture of Sifu. He looked JUST like my original master I once trained under. I brought it up on my phone and I turned to say to someone "Look at this, who does this look like?!" But then I stopped.

I looked around. I turned and I got quiet for a minute. I just realized in that very moment as I looked around: there was NO ONE from that time present at this moment. NO ONE here knows my old master, never met him, don't even know what he looks like. I couldn't believe it. Every person who was there that night was a person of the NEW generation. I could not believe it.

I had a mix of feelings in that moment. One was sad that there was no one from the old days there. It almost hurt me because I felt like there was no one actively in my life that linked me to a past that was so important to me. There was no one there I could say "remember when..." On the flip side I was also very shocked. Shocked that I can't believe how far I have come from that time. Wasn't it just yesterday that time? And the time I was so happy after that?

People say this all the time, but time just flies by in a blink of an eye. You can never keep track of where the time has gone. You find yourself in a whole new world. How did I get here all of a sudden? But I shouldn't question it. Because another feeling I had was once again gratitude. I was very grateful to be with this new crew. This new energy. These are grown adults who get "it", mature and have values, level headed, fun spirited, and loyal. Loyal beyond words. It's new. It's different. I don't know how to feel about that.

But I learned last year to JUST BE. So I did. And guess what? I was very happy. I was very happy to be with these people. I think it was in that moment I realized how far old times have gotten from me, and new times were being made. It was a real eye opener. (BOWS)

Yours in service,
MASTER A TRENTO

The Second Iteration of Just Be

Master Trento with the master and the mentors all together. 

Please Watch this beautiful video made by Mike Grella!

During the terrible-horrible-no good-very bad 2014, Sifu had told me that his one wish for me was to JUST BE. Anyone who knows me well knows there is nothing I would ever do that is NOT on a grand scale and above and beyond. So I took that advice and took it to the extreme as I always do. At that time, I really needed it. I needed a pick me up and something to look forward to. I even literally called it the JUST BE BBQ. And it just happened that the reoccurring theme of the entire year and solution to every problem was to JUST BE! We even had an anthem for the year! #LetItGo

When I did the JUST BE BBQ, it was supposed to be a gathering of all the most important people of the Trento-verse. The all-star cast of ym life, if you will. Quite honestly it was the happiest I was all year in 2014 next to nationals. It was supposed to be a one time event.

Well little did I know. Everyone kept asking me to do it again. "You gotta do it again!" "When is the next Just Be BBQ?" "We're doing the BBQ again this year, right?" Over and over. Well 2015 was going so well and some major changes have been made through moves, changes, and deletions, so I decided why the hell not, let's celebrate it. I was also seeing a reoccurring theme that kept coming up: Support. And as much as support was brought up, so was loyalty. 

SO yes, we had once again the second iteration of the Just Be BBQ. And in my opinion, it was even better than last year, and I had even more fun. But I was also extremely grateful to be celebrating these wonderful people who are in my support system. And it is one of the VERY few times I can get all these areas of my life together in one place.

My family members from my brothers and my cousins were there, my students of old generations and new generations were there, dear friends of mine from my early training years, high school friends, many of my mentors and the master himself. God Bless Mike who took all the pictures and made a beautiful video above that has captured just about all the best moments. 

Some historical moments also occurred. Some of my newer students got to meet Sifu for the first time. It's the first time I've been able to get most of my mentors together. It was the first time Master Balon and Sifu met!! It was also a reunion of most of the Friars of Old! I drank, I was belated with happiness and gratitude.

The Friars of Old, my best and longest friends

Maria and I have been friends since the first grade! 

At one point I sat aside by myself and just took in everything at one time. I looked around. I was looking at Thomas, Nicole, Heather, Derek, Juneta, and Maria laughing. I saw Ann Marie talking with Charlene and Mary Ellen. I saw Old Mike and New Mike hanging with my brother Eric and cousin Matthew. I was watching Master Balon and Mrs. Balon with Master DeJesus and Mrs. DeJesus listening to Sifu and Simo tell a story. In that moment, the gratitude the flooded me was beyond words. I remember where I was a year ago at that time. And then I sat a few minutes more, just being....

One of my favorite moments was everyone was when everyone on their own account brought the chairs together and made a circle. We made a small bon fire in the center and everyone just intermingled and interacted together. I loved how when Sifu spoke everyone was gravitated to what he had to say. I loved how everyone laughed with each other. I loved how everyone was together to just be. My student Thomas Cubby took out his ukulele and began playing songs and we all sang. The one we ALL sang together was Let It Be which is why Mike chose it for the video the second half. 

During our little bon fire, out of no where these fire works began taking place right above us! We have no clue where they came from or who was shooting them up. While they were going off, Master Balon turned to me and said "Only at a Trento event would fireworks start going off! How fitting!" I smiled. That meant a lot to me for him to say. 

Yes, my world is pretty magical. I have some great participants in my world. These are people who love me the most and want to be in this awesome world. These are the people who will benefit the most in the only way our magic does work. I remembered how I love bringing people together and keeping them connected. As Jimmy Stewart said in It's a Wonderful Life, "No man is a failure who has friends." And I am DOUBLY blessed to have each one of these people who I love so much who I call FAMILY.

Yours in service,

MASTER A TRENTO

Battle Ready at Mike Lee's

Mike Lee Kanarek and Master Trento at the Haganah USA Headquarters in Margate, FL

Back in March I attended the 2015 Haganah Conference. I went to get certified in Gen 2 Gun Disarm material in Nov 2014 in West Chester, PA and then was invited to the conference where I completed my certifications with the Knife and Empty Hand, upgraded Gen 2 Haganah FIGHT material. At the conference, the founder Mike Lee Kanarek had announced he was holding a certification at his school in Florida for Battle-Ready Kickboxing. I jumped immediately on the opportunity. He also told me it was a certification I would very much enjoy.

The last weekend on May, I flew down to Florida where for two days I would be training at Mike Lee Kanarek's school for the Battle-Ready Kickboxing Certification. I was very excited and knew this was a great opportunity as he had mentioned that he will be seldom with his certifications within the next year. But whenever you get a chance to work with a world class teacher like him at his own school, there's a great thrill that comes with the experience.

For weeks prior the certification, Mike Lee would text message all the people attending the certification, warning us that this certification would be VERY physical, VERY trying, and if anyone felt they couldn't handle it to not come and wait till next time. Almost every day he would send messages like that. Honestly, there was even a point where I felt like "Damn, I'm getting worried. I wonder if I can do this..." but I'm the kind of person I am not afraid of failing. I'll do my best and learn a lot and gain the experience either way. So I accepted the challenge.

When I got to his school, I was waiting outside of the school where a bunch of Haganah warriors from the brotherhood began to gather. Some came from New York, Pennsylvania, New Jersey, Texas, and I think even Chicago. And of course a bunch of Florida. The attire was white T-Shirt, army pants, and we had certain things we had to bring in rucksacks. We waited patiently and Then Mike Lee arrived in his car and parked. His car just sat there parked for about a minute, and then he pulled out and drove away. (blink blink).

I had no clue what that was meant to be. Did he forget something? Was he trying to intimidate? Was he testing us? Did he just want to see who was on time? I had no clue. Then maybe a half hour later Mike Lee drove up again and as he arrived, everyone received a text message from him with a picture that stated :80% of Success is Showing Up.

We all signed in and we began with the lecture part of the certification where in Mike Lee's school we learned fundamental practices and routines, outlines, concepts, and a little back history to the program that actually began long ago but has been upgraded and re-surfacing as part of the Haganah system. After several hours of going over this information we got our rucksacks and began to make our way outside into the Florida night.

I have to tell you, it was such a thrilling experience to be jogging in the night with everyone to the place where we would do our physical qualifier for the certification. I really felt as if I were going out into battle with my brigade or something. We were given our objectives and did our qualifier which involved a lot of running and drills that had to be done in a time limit. The following day we began early and did a module of the isometric conditioning that teaches principles and combatives when fighting.

Listening to Mike Lee is absolutely fascinating. Not only technically and strategically but philosophically. I said that when I first met him. I loved to hear and watch and learn. I remember I kept thinking, "Damn, I bet there are so many people who think they can box and not know ANY of this!" I was really fascinated putting it all together and learning the combinations and methods to this type of fighting. I also kept thinking of my mentor back home, Master DeJesus. I wanted to make him proud. I was so grateful to being there and I'd never be a part of this world without him. Even Mike Lee said to me, "Trento! You're finally one of us! Do you believe it?"

You never know where you're going until you get there. And when you get there sometimes you don't know where to go. But just be and be grateful for the adventure! It was a great time being with all these badass warriors, many who also do other disciplines as well. But we all shared this amazing experience from this phenomenal leader. I chuckled a few times because I can see my mentor and his wife chuckling in my head. Who would have ever thought I would own boxing gloves and learning this level of combat? Who would have ever thought I'd be training at Mike Lee's school? Who would have ever thought....

Yours in service,
MASTER A TRENTO

It's Been A While

Yes. It HAS been a while. It was a full year. It really has been. I haven't blogged since March. It was intentional. Not that it was to be mysterious or silent for any reason. I had to focus. If you recall, back in February I blogged that NO ONE was more excited about entering 2015 than I was. And It was true. Entering the year of the wooden sheep, I intended to do exactly what I needed to energetically put forth in motion the things I wanted for my life. And I've not only focused and worked, but had fun.

I have been training. I have been studying. I have been building. I have been reinventing. I have my mentors. I have my master. I have my projects. I have my teaching. I was given a book over a year ago written by Dolly Parton about dreaming more. Well I have continued to do so, and then some. There are certain things I've done in life I never thought I'd be doing, or some things I knew I would but just not so soon.

I've been learning. I've learned a lot. I also made a big move, changing locations of my business right at the beginning of the year and making a new foundation of growth that I am very happy about. I have brought myself to a whole new level of mastery, but not necessarily with ease or without a few bumps. But we must take all experiences with gratitude to bringing us right where we need to be.

I have traveled a lot. More than I ever thought I would have. I've been to date to Georgia five times, Florida four times, Baltimore four times, I was just in Tennessee, and I have enjoyed everywhere I have gone. Awesome adventures, phenomenal opportunities, and fantastic fun. I've been keeping busy.

My idea of hell is an empty calendar. People have no idea how true that is for me. But at the same time, I love structure, and thrive on consistency. I never get bored or feel stagnation, and adjust and reinvent as I go along because it just fits when it's time. And 2016 looks like it's going to be great. But I have a very big goal in mind right now and just about everything I am doing relates to this event in some way.

I am testing for 5th Degree Black Belt in July. I still have a lot of work to do. And I'll do it all. I have a five year plan that follows that, but I have a lot that will lead up to this test. You know, in martial arts, everyone has their "thing". Some people it's sparring. Other people it's forms, Maybe board breaking. Sometimes it's self-defense. For me, it's Black Belt tests. I always loved taking Black Belt tests and being put through all my challenges and pushing myself beyond my limits through the magic of martial arts. I love so much what it is I do, and some people really don't get what it is I do. But that's okay, martial arts is a personal journey for us all who train.

For ME, the Black Belt tests I have taken to date all have a different meaning and purpose for me. mastering the basics, mastering technique, mastering mindset, mastering self- mastering the art. And 5th Degree is no different, and there are MANY layers of it. It is mastering Spirit. There are MANY layers to this concept. It is also, in fact, one of the tenets of Taekwondo (indomitable spirit). Well within the last few years in my beginning "master training", my spirit has floated, it has been broken down, it has been transformed, and it has grown. Using the power of spirit and using one's spirit in all we do has also been very important discoveries.

But this test will also be very different for another reason. 4th Dan in my art is master level. It is the last test technically for "you" per se. As a servant leader, one must do for others, provide for others, help others, and contribute to others without expecting anything in return. The test I take should be an expression of that service and a representation of what it is I have done with spirit these last four years.

I have also been exploring extensively of the year's theme that has been reoccurring over and over. There will be many blogs on those reflections as well. So I'll get to review and explore a bit more with my blogs. Yes, I'm ready to start back up. The purpose when I originally began this blog was to give an honest and open reflection of my journey. My martial arts training has also been my journey of life. Some may find it entertaining, some may find it stupid, some may find it funny, some may learn something, some may relate. For me, it holds me accountable.

So here it is again: Being the Candle. Life is ALL about being the candle. Learning we have a radiance and allowing ourselves to shine where need be and help others to discover theirs. Love one another, for we live in this life together. We need to support our own dreams and self and support each other in the process of learning how to be the candle. Let's see what I find. Because it's been a while....

Yours in service,
MASTER A TRENTO