Tuesday, May 27, 2014

The "Just Be" BBQ

Me, Brenda, Sifu Pedro Yee, Prof. Lisa Sargese, Samantha Volk, Dr. Nina Harkhani
"Old friends pass away, new friends appear. It is just like the days. An old day passes, a new day arrives. The important thing is to make it meaningful: a meaningful friend, or a meaningful day."
-Dalai Lama
Michael Gavala, Simo Magdalena Yee, me, Mike Grella, and Sifu Pedro Yee.
"It is one of the blessings of old friends that you can afford to be stupid with them."
-Ralph Waldo Emerson
 
Me, Mr. George Valentino, Sifu Pedro Yee, Sensei Cara Parmigiani, and Prof. Lisa Sargese
"Age appears to be the best in four things: old wood best to burn, old wine to drink, old friends to trust, and old authors to read."
-Francis Bacon 
Sifu Pedro Yee, Simo Magdalena, Heather Marte, me, and Aram and Armina
"Remember the most valuable antiques are dear old friends."
-John Webster
The Friars of Old: Andrew Trento, Nina Harkhani, Kenneth Perez
"We are not enemies, but friends. We must not be enemies. Though passion may have strained, it must not break our bonds of affection. The mystic cords of memory will swell when again touched as surely they will be by the better angels of our nature."
-Abraham Lincoln
 
Three of my mentors: Charlene Gallitano (fitness mentor), Mr. George Valentino (Songahm TKD mentor), Prof. Lisa Sargese (mental training mentor).
A couple months I was talking to Sifu during one of our snow storms. I had a very difficult year, it still is a very extremely difficult year. Many drastic changes in my personal life, reinventing myself and my business as well. We were talking a little bit about them and Sifu said he wished only one thing for me and that was to JUST BE. Well that phrase stuck in my head for months.

It's been a very very very long time since I have given myself the opportunity to "just be". I have a vision, a dream almost, that I have had for years and years. It was a vision to have every single person who ever meant anything to me to be together in one single room, just having a wonderful time. Truth is, that vision will never happen. If anyone tried to plan it, they would fall short because the guest list is only in my head and my head alone, from the literally hundreds of relatives, friends, colleagues, and teachers who would be present.

But Sifu sparked an idea in my head, and I really wanted to do it. I wanted to have all the people whom I love and are dearest to me present day to be together and JUST BE. Let's get together and be together and laugh, enjoy each other's company, and live the day! I've never done this before. It would be the first time in Trento history to have the most important, heavy hitters, from all aspects of my life together at once. Most people have never met, they all know about each other but are only names of characters. Some haven't seen each other in years. But I wanted to take an opportunity to be with everyone after such a miserable year that I have had.

Across the street, dear friends and students of mine, Ara and Juneta, offered and opened their home to host this BBQ event. We worked together to have food and drinks, and set up for close to 40 people. Some cousins were invited, my brothers were invited, mentors were invited, my master and his wife were invited, my dearest friends the Friars were invited, students were invited, old school friends were invited, old CCD friends were invited, good friends of friends were present, fellow martial artists were there, and everyone's significant others were present.
Robert Lisciandrello, Samantha Volk, and Dr. Nina Harkhani
I was absolutely thrilled to have all these people together for the first time in a relaxed and comforting atmosphere. Robert has been one of my closest friends for nearly a decade. He was my first Black Belt under me ever from TMAFC, my first Black Belt coach, but also a friend who has been there for many ups and downs of my life. When I struggled to get back on my feet to train for my masters test because of events in my life, it was Robert who stepped up and helped me stay focused. His girlfriend, Samantha Volk, and one of my first students since she was six years old came back to training under me and received her 2nd Dan Black Belt under me and stepped up to the plate when others fell short a few years ago. She officiates with me at tournaments today and just graduated with her Associates Degree. I am so proud how much these two grew up.

A couple other of my very first students present were Frankie Peracchio and Storm Duke. I've known Frankie for a dozen years and he and his family have been very much a part of my family. I lived with them for a couple years, vacationed with them, and they've been present for all the major things in my life. Frankie was my first first Degree Black belt at TMAFC and got certified in Qigong with me and Lisa. Storm has presently returned to the martial arts scene, shadowing me and learning to teach again, and training with me, and also working with me on other projects. His presence again in my life has been wonderful and refreshing and it is a privilege to see the man he is becoming.

Mike Gavala started Taekwondo with me and continues to learn self-defense. He believe in what I stand for and has phenomenal qualities in business and leadership. I am extremely grateful for not only the time and work he does for me but for the amount he believes in me as a master. Mike Grella I have known since high school, even when he was a younger kid. We have worked on many projects in the past and present, but has become a real asset in my present day life and helps out at the school as much as he does in my personal affairs. I met through him Joss, who is as beautiful outside as she is inside, who helps me at the school and other projects. She believes in humanity and has a spirit that is positive and contagious. I also met Tyler who has been so enthusiastic and supportive to me and the rest of our little crew. Having him around with us has also been positive and refreshing.
Ann Marie Cooper, Charlene Galitano, Thomas Cubby, my cousin Patrick, and his girlfriend Angelina. A true picture of the vast areas of my life coming together!
I was thrilled to have family there. Both my brothers were present and I don't think they have ever spent time with some of these people who are in my life. It was great seeing them interact with some heavy hitters of my life, and my brother's girlfriend (who I absolutely love) was there to spend this wonderful day with us. My cousin Matthew and his girlfriend were there and he trains in martial arts with some people so he knows the magic we are involved in. My other cousin Patrick and his girlfriend were there and I was so happy to have him with us that day as well.

In 2008, I was a student at Montclair State University and took a World Religions class with Professor Lisa Sargese. I claimed her then as my mental training mentor as I fell in love with her enthusiasm, her energy, her intellect, and her witty and bubbly personality. Years later we not only become such great friends, sharing some very real life situations, some of my favorite moments with her are when we are learning and training together. Besides being a very important mentor, she is a dear friend who never gave up on me. A year later, another mentor gave me an opportunity when she was the general manager of a gym. Charlene gave me a home when I had no place to train, teach, and pushed the envelope as she allowed me to hone my skills in the fitness field that I have incorporated today. She is also a dear friend whose heart is as big as her loyalty. And 4th Degree George Valentino, the yin to my yang who attended with his beautiful girlfriend, brought his big smile to the BBQ. It is so wonderful knowing I have someone who loves Taekwondo and has that same passion for not only the art but for my students as well.

I began martial arts with a group of friends that went to our martial arts school every day religiously, dubbing us the name The Frairs. We are now the Friars of Old. Nina JUST graduated medical school and will be going to Baltimore for her residency and Kenny goes to the University of Rhode Island. The Friars are the friends who share the most with me, due to the deep chains of origin we endured together in the martial arts. That is a bond that spiritually connects you in a way no one can understand unless you're in it. An unofficial Friar would be Kenny's mother, Jessie, who has been one of my closest best friends for so many years. We have always been able to live life with enthusiasm, child-like wonder, and with a lot of laughter. It meant the world to have all three of them there.
Ann Marie Cooper, mentor Charlene Gallitano, Simo Magdalena Yee, mentor Prof. Lisa Sargese. One of my favorite pictures.
My brother Thomas, his girlfriend Jamie, me, and my brother Eric.
An Marie has a heart of gold. We met at another mentor's school at a Haganah seminar and again at a Qigong workshop. We continued to run into each other and after a while you just get to know someone's energy. She is sharp, beautiful, great sense of humor, and she can blend in with anyone with her pleasant personality. Sensei Cara Parmigiani became a very close friend in a very unexpected time. I admire her for her unlimited list of talents, inexhaustible adventures, and above all, her tremendous loyalty and friendship. It's amazing how we run into people in life like Ann Marie and Cara and never realize how important they can become in your life at a later time.

 It was an absolute honor and privilege to have my master, Sifu Pedro Yee, and his wife, Simo Magdalena, to be present at this momentous event. I told Sifu when I met in in 2011 that I wanted him to be my new master but not until after my 4th Degree test in Taekwondo. He watched me carefully for a year and training with Sifu has enhanced my martial arts to a degree only I have ever believed to be true in my dreams. But beyond martial arts, Sifu has taught me as any true master could how to enhance my life. He has guided me in a way on all levels to just being me, as the theme of this BBQ was: just be. Sifu knows he means the world to me and I couldn't have asked for a greater person to call my master. But to have him join and interact with some of the other important people in my life was such a treasure to see. And we had such a wonderful time together, and his wife Magdalena who is full of life brought her own ray of light to this party that I am so grateful to her for.
My pal Frankie Peracchio and I.

Sensei Cara Parmigiani, Our host Ara Grigoryan, Mr. George Valentino, and his girlfriend Sarah.


My friend Heather, from CCD in seventh and eighth grade was there! Our friend Brenda who we met through Lisa was there, and she made cookies that very morning for us! Newer friends like Daiva and Marius and Daichi were there! My student Thomas Cubby was there! My neighbors Julian and Andrew were there! It was just one big get together of so many good people. Good people with good energy, with good laugher, good company, and good love. There was nothing but love at this event, and I couldn't have been happier. It was the happiest I've been in a long time. This event was a major distraction from the bitter sweet things, or the stressful things going on in life.

But the share this day with all these people, in the words of Lisa, this was the real ALL STAR compilation of people. Everyone mixed and mingled beautifully. People who never met got to meet and talk. We ate together, we drank together. We laughed, a few of us danced. A couple even sang. Ara made a toast that was heartfelt, yet even witty, stating that with all these different first, second, fourth, and even an eighth degree Black Belt present, he never felt so safe in his life. LOL!!!!
Frankie and Sifu hugging
Nina and Ann Marie met for the first time
Twelve hours we spent together. Nothing but positive energy. Nothing but love. The love at this BBQ that was shared with everyone was phenomenal! I don't know when I will do this again. I don't know if I ever will. But this event was definitely one for the history books. To have shared this day with all these people will be something I will treasure for all time. There were literally a handful of people who should have been here at this event. But hence is life. I want to personally thank Ara and Juneta for graciously opening their home for us all, and making this get together possible. They were magnificent hosts, and I thank them for their warm hospitality and hard work to make this BBQ possible. It meant the world to me.

And thank you to all who were there. Please know how much each and every one of you mean to me. You're not just students. You're not just colleagues. You're not just Black Belts. You're not just mentors. You're not just my master. You're not just friends. You're not just acquaintances. You're not just neighbors. You're not just relatives. You are all family to me. Some of you have been with me for nearly twenty years. Some only a few months. But you're all the cream of the crop to me. I love you all so much, and thank you for sharing this day to smile. (BOWS)

Yours in service,
MASTER A TRENTO





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