A Year in Review

Note: When I say that I am going to do something, I do it. It may not be in the time someone else wants it, it may not be the way someone would expect it, it may not be WHY someone wants it, it may not be how, but when I say I will, I will. When I say I won't, then by all means push my buttons until I change my mind. But the commitments we make to others are just as important as the commitments we make to ourselves.

I hated 2011. I really did. I know, I know, I should never use the word hate. But it was such a bad year for me on a personal level. Very very early on in the year a few events really left me beyond hurt and incapable to doing things I loved to do. I loved watching movies. I loved watching TV shows. I loved eating healthy. I loved cooking pasta and sauce (which I did Super Bowl this year). And above all, I loved taking pictures.

We have to be very careful not to allow outside forces affect our inner joy. Not allow, things to take away from what brings us joy and pleasure. I did the total opposite. And in 2011, I did not do ANY of the things that would make me happy that I enjoyed. I stopped watching Friends and The Big Bang Theory. I stopped getting movies to watch. I pretty much stopped watching TV altogether, and don't get me wrong, it is not like I was/am a couch potato. But it was just a time for relaxing, because what I do during the day and week is constant motion.

Well it's a year later, and since I started taking great strides to becoming a master since July, I have come a long way. But now I am facing the demons and fears. And I began to conquer them: alone. Yeah, I had a big problem going through this part, but a true master can stand on his own two feet and face the music despite the odds and repercussions. It was the first weekend in MONTHS I had no plans. And I kept it that way. I got like 7 movies I really wanted to see, and I actually got to watch one with Sadie. It was fantastic! At first my thoughts left me a little bit, realizing what I was doing. I am actually sitting down to watch a movie. Immediately the devil on one shoulder says you shouldn't be doing something that makes you happy! Then the angel on the other shoulder says, ah don't listen to him!

I used to have a friend I would watch movies with all the time. We had very much the same taste in movies and we were always telling each other of some other movie we found we should watch together! After so long of doing that, you associate those good times which become lost times with that very thing. And I really haven't sat down to watch a movie in a year. And it was actually very emotional to finally do, but no tears! Mostly because I didn't want my roommate to see any from me. Although she's the most empathetic person I can speak to, I don't want her seeing any tears from me.

Another thing I did was I now own EVERY Walt Disney animated movie! I absolutely love Walt Disney movies, it is one of those things that keep the little child inside of me alive. My favorite cartoon character is Mickey Mouse, most people who know me well enough know this. My favorite vacation place is Disney World, I will tire out anyone who goes with me LOL! SO I now have every Disney movie, something I have been saying for years I would do. Well I did it. And you know what I did with Sadie on Saturday? We watched three of them. That was BEFORE we watched one of the new movies I got. Wow. I did it.

I also got a few favorite TV shows of mine like Will and Grace, and now I have Friends once again and think I am ready to conquer that. Now that the Qi is flowing, I need it to purify. Kristin also had me get the TV Show Oz. So I said what the heck, so I got it, and we watched the entire first season this weekend! I watched a TV show?! Yes I did. And I loved it, Kristin has some awesome taste.

Then I decided to push the envelope with myself. I was ready to tackle the pictures. In the past I would take hundreds of pictures a month and organize them on a flash drive and upload them to my Facebook. I did this for years, since I guess 2005. This past year, 2011, I did not. I was the one with a camera every where I would go and be annoying and take pictures of every moment around! And believe me, I got them. But this project was the hardest.

You know how certain songs and certain types of weather remind you of a particular time in your life? It has that feel and aura about it? The weather, being what it is now, is doing that for me right now. It reminds me of what it was like this time last year. But then to actually visually seeing it all through pictures. Each picture I looked at, I saw the pretend smiles I forced myself to wear, remembering what my thinking was, what I was feeling, and I also realized how many things I did over the year that I couldn't really fully enjoy as I could have and should have.

IN February 2011 I went to see Lady Gaga in concert.

I went to a Lady Gaga concert which was phenomenal. But it was very early in the year and the emotions were very fresh. I went to Florida with my Aunt, cousins, mother, and brothers. I remember what that time was like too. We went to Universal and a day in my most favorite place, Disney. I had my one year anniversary and brought kids to their first tournament. I did a fundraiser at TMAFC, I competed myself in my first tournament in four years. I really still did a lot, and I was in a fog the whole time. Slowly I emerged and I almost missed capturing it all.

Aunt Karen, my cousins and brothers with me on Splash Mountain

I realized me not doing my pictures was my way of not seeing the year again. It was my way of not wanting to remember the year at all. Avoidance, and putting off the inevitable. And I would have been successful, but not true. Going through these pictures really brings up a lot of memories, but as a master, I have to put my focus on what I need to in order to move forward. But what makes that focus easier is that I gave myself the sense of accomplishment. I organized and downloaded all my pictures, with a few more still to do. I uploaded quite a bit on Facebook and almost all caught up. I am setting the stage to continue to do so, like I used to. Because it makes me happy. I watched a movie, and an entire TV show, I did everything I said I would do. I am proud.

I actually went to the Wizarding World of Harry Potter in Universal

How do I not go to the Lucille Ball Tribute in Universal!

2012 is already going so much better. But with review, comes lessons and decisions. Motivation instead of regret. Commitments instead of frustration. It's about making things happen. With my business I have brought my students to competitions like I said I would. I worked with my mentors like I said I would. I moved out like I said I would. I training with my old schedule like I said I would. I will be testing for 4th Degree master lie I said I would and have been competing like I said I would. Consistency is important and I have every intention of keeping the things important to me consistent. 

Making time for my movies and shows, taking my pictures, continuing with my training, eating and sleeping the way I want, making my sauce more often, I will do it all. No more avoiding, no more putting off. Will there be some bumps and things I will have trouble with. Of course. I welcome the challenges. This is the year of making things happen. I reviewed the year, and now it is over. Looking forward to seeing the year that is to come. 

Yours in service,

ANDREW TRENTO