Powerhouse of Friendship

"You can tell you are on your way to mastery when you see the gap closing between Willing and Experiencing" - Page 10 of 'Conversations with God;

"The teacher can only guide, it is up to the student to carry out."

-Anonymous

 

I cannot even remember how many years it has been since I met Robert Lisciandrello. His sister Briana took the pre-school karate class at the time known as Little Ninjas. At the time it was once a week for a half hour taught by the one and only Kristin Barrett, and while that class went on, I would be training and working out before I had to teach my class after hers. And Briana's brother would have to tag along and sit and watch as the class went on. But he wasn't watching Briana's class. When we wasn't talking baseball with one of the mother's in the reception area, we was watching 14 year old me training.

 

Little did he know that one day he would be right in there training not only under my instruction, but WITH me. He watched a Black Belt test in October 2004 and he said that he would NEVER EVER do karate. Well never say never! For whatever reason, a few months later Robert joined the martial arts program and I was in charge of doing the first day students. To this day, almost eight years ago, I have never done as much with a student as I did with Robert on a first day. I taught him all his basic blocks, his basic kicks, his kicking combination, his techniques on the bag AND target, and I even taught him his entire form. It was an hour class!

Ms Barrett was gone maybe half a year later and the school worked at changed locations. I got sick for a while, and then when I returned I began teaching the classes and helping run the school once again. My old master was beginning a new leadership team (which as a nice way of saying recruiting new slaves) to help assist and learn how to teach classes and so forth. Robert was getting older and was getting into his training a lot, even though baseball was his priority. He was a really good kid. 

You know how you go through life and there are certain moments you can recall that are such defining moments but you don't realize it until way way after? Well one of those defining moments for me was one Friday night when I finished teaching my sparring class that Robert used to assist with me. Robert learned more than he ever did assisting with me on Fridays about sparring than as a student in the class. Well, I was going to go out to the mall and hang out with a few other friends and I decided to ask Robert to come along. "Hey Robert! (I always call him his full name) Wanna go to the mall with us?" Well the rest was history. And an awesome friendship began. I've known his family for so long, Briana was like three years old and grew up with me teaching her and betting her junior Black Belt, how many holidays have we gone through, and his parents trusted me with him which I was very mindful of. We just had a very good time whatever it is we did. And it could something as simple as going to the store to buy something.

When my old master let me go, it was Robert's house I ended up going. No rhyme or reason, I just found that was where Rosie (my car) steered me. Robert, Briana, and his family really stood by my side that day when I distraught. And I let Robert see my vulnerability for the first time. I don't think many have ever seen me in my worst moments. Robert did. And I'll never forget him saying "Do you know what it's like seeing the strongest person you know look so weak?" I think it scared him at the time. But he stood by my side and followed me. His mother allowed me to use their basement when I as teaching six or more students at a time for the 16 months before I opened TMAFC. And Robert took that dream of mine as if it were his own. It meant something to him too. 

We used to kid around before my departing of my old master that how funny would it be if I started my own school and Robert became my first Black Belt? Well, BE CAREFUL WHAT YOU WISH FOR. November 16-21, 2009 I gave TMAFC's first Black Belt test and Robert and Erin would be my first Black Belts. And Robert as the first person I wrapped the Black Belt around for TMAFC. The kid who vowed never to do karate became my first Black Belt. 

Robert taking his deputy Black Belt test in November 2009

Robert doing self-defense on his last day of Black Belt testing, Nov. 2009

Robert signing the Black Belt oath as TMAFC's first Black Belt.

He took the honor of being the first Black Belt quite seriously. And he has transformed into a wonderful young man from what he has learned through the martial arts. He's still a little stubborn (as most of us Italians are!!) but he has learned a great deal of controlling anger, building up focus, remaining calm when it matters most, patience, etc. When I was going up the Black Belt ranks training and growing, he would watch a lot, and see what I was going through in my training and he really took what I would teach him to heart. When he was younger he really took the mental training I began learning back in 2007-2008 very seriously and would be amazed at the things I would accomplish, asking me to do it for him. Although, I was trying to explain he could do it all too. And once in a while he would train with me and do my drills in the park that I would do.

When I went through my trauma almost a year ago and I was with my family, Robert came to find me. And he stayed with me and my family the entire time. Once again, Robert saw me in what WAS my worst moment. And Robert became as hurt and angry as if the trauma had happened to him. If there was one thing I knew but was witnessing in an entirely different light in that moment, Robert's loyalty was beyond anything I have ever felt before from anyone. Robert has ALWAYS been my most loyal friend, and I am most grateful for that than anything else. Did I ever imagine I would have gained the POWERHOUSE OF FRIENDSHIP that day I asked him the hang out in the mall? I had no idea. 

Now Robert as a student! He in a pain in the ass and proud of it! He works very hard at that LOL!!! But He works very hard in general. And his work does pay off. This past summer, there were many nights after classes were over that we would train. HE ASKED ME. I never asked him. It was HIS choice. He knew I was struggling in getting back onto my feet with my own training, and he knew this would help if he were right in there with me doing it (he doesn't think I know what he was doing =P).

After he took his maintenance test for 1st Degree Black Belt in December 2010, he said he wanted to continue training but not test again. Well it surprised me for him to tell me he was going to level test this January. He was very very behind in classes if he wanted to qualify. Well in a matter of four months he took so many classes and did so much extra training that he caught up and surpasses the others who are testing in January with him! And he trained with me every week in the morning at 7-7:30 for two hours this whole time in my training cycle. And thank God for Robert, because I really don't know if I would have gotten up to do my training. 

 

 And Robert has been making tremendous amount of progress. His forms are greater than they've ever been, his sparring which he really didn't like before he has really gotten into and improved drastically, his focus is great, and hi conditioning is better than it's ever been. And he is taking his training seriously. He researched on his own time, he still practices in his basement, or after class for a little, just to make sure he is prepared. He makes it his business to know what he needs to know. He is applying all the lessons, skills, and strategies that I have been teaching for YEARS to all my students. 

As an instructor I cannot explain the thrill I get from a student to put this much work in, getting the results, and taking the training seriously, yet not TOO seriously. He was calling me up the other night to ask questions for his notes he was taking for his training (which I ALWAYS encourage my students, especially Black Belts to do) and he was doing them yesterday with me during the day. And his notes were so detailed and organized! I was like the proud father seeing him do this. And with all this time and effort, he still goes to college and maintains good grades, makes time for friends and family, he goes with his cousins when they are around to the WaWa for sandwiches, he works at CVS, and has family time. He embodies what a Black Belt is all about: Optimum Balance.

Without him I don't think I'd have had the motivation to get out of bed in the morning or make any dent this fall. Because of him I did. For Robert, I'd get up in the morning for. Not me. And that is not necessarily good. I need to be able to wake up for me. Well spirit has already brought up the test. Next semester, Robert's schedule will not allow him to do the training in the morning as much as we did this past semester. I think Spirit is saying to me, "Now it's time for you to do it for YOU." Spirit works in mysterious ways. And Spirit is right. It's time for me to do it for ME. I have to do the training alone again. I have to put the energy and the effort and work all together like I used to. SEVEN MONTHS until the master test. And the road to mastership is one to make alone, but to share. 

I will finish my plan out for December, and then January to June is going to be the race to the finish line. I speak directly to Robert now. Thank You. Thank you for being a phenomenal student, a fantastic representation of Trento Teachings of martial arts, for being an awesome TMAFC Black Belt, for being who you are, for your loyalty, and for being one of the best friends I could ever ask for. Who would have known when you used to watch me training when you were nine or ten in the window you'd be actually doing it with me eight years later. And no matter how many times or ways I can think of to show you my gratitude, nothing can truly express it. Thank you, to the powerhouse of friendship that you are! I am proud of you.

Yours in service,
ANDREW TRENTO