"Lucille Ball was pragmatic, shrewd, and an excellent strategist, carefully planning her moves for maximum effectiveness and advantage. She was willing to work long and persistently for what she wants and often she did things the right way. Lucille did not expect others to take care of her and sometimes refused or simply did not seek any outside help. She was very ambitious, but quietly so. There was nothing flamboyant or flashy about her approach. She was very responsible, conscientious, and concerned with her duties to others and how she comes across socially - her "rank so to speak. To others Lucille Ball seemed mature, serious, quiet, reflective, and emotional...Lucille always liked to appear poised and in control; and she hated to show any weakness, vulnerability, or chinks in her armor...."
"Lucille Ball respected tradition and the time-honored way of doing things, and she feels that there is much to be gained from studying history and also by learning from older, more experienced people. A wise mentor or father was often Ball's guide in life, and she in turn developed a great deal of hard earned wisdom, which she liked to impart to younger people. Lucille Ball had a stern, authoritarian, no-nonsense aspect to her personality. She expected much from herself and may not have given herself enough leeway to experiment and make mistakes. She also tended to be rather close-fisted, to save and conserve her money and resources rather than spend or enjoy them. Lucille Ball spent money on things of quality and lasting value, things which were good investments, but not frivolous temporary pleasures. There was a bit of ascetic in her. Lucille exercised great self-discipline and self-control and she could 'do without' very well. Her tastes were generally understated and simple..."
"Though she may had other, more colorful and imaginative sides, the face Ball showed the world was modest and rather conservative. At times, Lucille Ball came across to others as being rather intense and possibly manipulative or controlling...Others may have seen Lucille as a cool, reserved and unapproachable person, perhaps as a result of her conservative and stern upbringing. Lucille could have felt no one understands her and tends to isolate herself from others."
-Anonymous
I bet as you read this long quote about Lucille Ball, you would never have thought such a thing. Unless you are a die hard fan of not only the character of work of Lucille Ball but of the life and work ethic of this woman, you couldn't have possibly known this. I have written countless blogs on the strong women who have been in my life, many blogs on how I admire Lucille Ball and am a big fan, but there is more to my liking to this woman.
Not only have I watched every episode of I Love Lucy since I was young and continue to watch them and laugh to this day, but I have researched a lot about her life as well. I read her autobiography, watched many interviews from her or about her. I have watched documentaries and re-enacted movies about her as well. What I have always loved about Lucy was not only the magnificent work she created, but the unparalleled work ethic. I admired it, because I related to her. I saw it in myself.
When Lucy filmed her television show with her then husband Desi Arnaz, Desi was a fantastic businessman and pioneered how television would work up to today! And Lucy was a perfectionist at her art and did things no other comedian, woman, or actor/actress had ever done. If it weren't for her we would never have TV today, truly.
When they divorced, and began her new show The Lucy Show, she came in and saw how the script was wrong, the lighting was incorrect, and props weren't right. She said to her protege Carol Burnett "You know kid, I used to come in and all I had to do was BE LUCY. But after my divorce I had to do EVERYTHING Lucy did and I had to do EVERYTHING Desi did. I had to be BOTH Lucy AND Desi." And that's exactly what she did.
It didn't matter that she was a women, it didn't matter she was an actress, she was all business and as the head of the entire Desilu Studio, she ran it with an iron fist. Carol Burnett described Lucy as "all business." "If she didn't like something, you'd know it. If you loved something, you know it equally and knew it was nothing personal. But she was definitely tough." She did everything and was a perfectionist to the tee. She wanted to know EVERY little thing pertaining to her business and show. She wanted to know everyone's names, every line of every script, every prop, every position of the lights, what was said at every meeting, how much money was going where, etc. She knew her business inside and out, made excellent decisions including the singing of TV shows such as Mission Impossible and Star Trek.
And she was still the Queen of Comedy and her own TV show was number one on the charts. She was untouchable. It was her stern, no nonsense attitude that got her where she was. She came off to the world as this zanny, silly, funny, sweetheart like her character on television. Even though she was pleasant to everyone, she had no censor to what she said or how she said it, she just did, nothing personal, and was dead on RIGHT when it came to her business.
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| Lucille Ball accepting an award presented to her by her protege and dear friend, Carol Burnett. Lucille was Carol's idol since childhood and had the privilege of working with her on her own show and mentored her to the end of her days. |
When I read this quote, it hit about a thousand chords and put into words of exactly how I felt about myself. Back in the day when I apprenticed under my old master with BFF Kristin Barrett, we were a team like no other. She was stern and strict, but her classes were appropriately standard. My personality at the time was opposite, I was light hearted and always smiling, but my classes were tough and hard. Kristin used to call me "sarge" for the way I taught, but I did it with a smile.
When Kristin went separate ways from my old master a few years before me, I felt I had to be both Kristin AND myself. It took a couple of years to find the happy medium until I taught completely solo. When I began my own business, the real Lucy really began to come out of me. But I had that personality all through high school too, anyone who went to school with me can tell you. Pleasantly joyful but cutthroat appropriately so. Even some teachers knew not to cross me when it came time to work right.
Many people labeled Lucy as a bitch or moody or cut throat. But no one seemed to realize it was because of her personality that made things so great happen. And those who stuck around benefited greatly, and those who couldn't take it and left her kicked themselves a thousand times over. Lucy felt misunderstood and hurt when the ones closest to her should know better.
Over the years I am always told that I think I am never wrong, am moody, am impatient, and they hate "the way" I say things. As I have gotten older, I have learned to not really care, like Lucy. I say what I mean, most people don't. I say what I feel after inwardly reflecting and being sure I am not out of line or inappropriate. And WHAT I am saying is more important than HOW. So if you don't like it, GET OVER IT. I make it a rule to not open my mouth UNLESS I know what I am talking about. Silence is sometimes the best answer and I opt to be silent many times. My friends and family reading this may actually be laughing right now. But it's true. Imagine if I didn't keep silent when I do? o___O
But what hurts and bothers me the most, is when the people closest to me who I feel SHOULD understand me don't. And they say these things. Just like Lucy, who felt misunderstood and isolated herself when it happened, it bothered me. It wasn't until she was long gone after she died did people look at how she acted in a different way, and gave her credit instead of criticism to her personality, that attributed to the work she produced and empire she built. If people just stepped outside of themselves and stop getting so offended (which is what it means to making it about themselves, worrying how they feel from the exterior expression vs the actual subject matter) and just listened and understood, and perhaps trust what a master like Lucy knows and directs, that maybe just maybe good things will follow no questions asked.
So do I have to die for people to realize that about me? I've done enough devils advocate with myself to see where I really am just being emotional and mopy about this topic to know, NO. The best teachers I have ever had, and the greatest people in history and culture who did ANYTHING in our world, had these personalities. The great Lucy was one of them. I hope to do great and wonderful things in my future through martial arts. I am happy, light hearted, enthusiastic, grateful, and encouraging. Or at least I put my effort to doing so. At the same time, I can short, blunt, and stern when it is important enough, and serious enough. ESPECIALLY when it comes to my business and training.
Lucy, I always understand how you felt. I always admired the work ethic you had to produce what you did. I understand you, and I relate to you. I hope one day, my closest inner circle along with the rest of the world, will understand me and replace criticism with perhaps the same admiration as I have for you. (BOWS)
Yours in service,
MASTER TRENTO
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